Learning to communicate when you’re angry


1384549428567_communication-when-angryWhen you are at the height of your emotions, where do you pull out your words? Do you take a deep breath before you speak your mind or do you simply explode out of passionate anger? Learning to communicate is not just about saying what you want with utter disregard of other people. It’s also about being mindful of your choice of words and your manner of delivery.

This brings to mind the words of Laurence J. Peter: “Speak when you are angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.”

How many people have you hurt with your words that you later on regret??

Think about it. There’s so much noise in our lives that it’s easy for all these to just get to our heads and instantaneously cause an outburst we’d later regret. When this happens, it’s always best to take a step back and get to our core.

1.    What is one thing that you always say when you’re angry?

You might want to reflect a little about certain mannerisms and words that you say when you get angry. You might have gotten so used to saying these words that you don’t realize how much it hurts the people around you.

2.    What do you do when you’re angry?

It takes a certain sense of courage to look back and introspect at how you handle yourself whenever you’re angry. Perhaps you readily confront or say something hurtful to the other person without realizing it. Why don’t you ask the people closest to you if you’ve hurt them in any way without meaning to, at the height of your anger?

3.    Do you understand what speaking with anger does?

It doesn’t take much to realize what anger can do to you. It can destroy relationships or, at the very least, damage them. When you speak from a place of anger, you tend to sow negativity where there should be conflict resolution.

4.    Where does your anger come from?

The next step is to find the root cause of your anger. You’d be surprised to know that more often than not, it’s not the other person that causes the anger, but your own insecurities, fears, or feeling of being unloved.

Once you figure out where your feelings of anger are coming from, you’d soon realize that whenever you feel the same seething rage, all you have to do is take a step back, breathe deeply, and remember to speak with love.