The “Inner Game” of Time Management

Whenever I survey individuals and organizations on their top three challenges at work, I almost always hear that there is too much to do and not enough time. And I’ve heard the same thing for the last 20 years. Even with all the brilliant time management systems out there, even with all the highly innovative and smart people doing the work, and even with all the time-saving technology available to us. It begs the question: “Is time management about doing something different or about being something different–or both?” My answer is that it’s both, but there has been an over focus on the outer game of time management and not enough on the inner game.

The Myth of Time Scarcity

Now I realize this is the antithesis of traditional time management, where it’s all about willing yourself to move faster, prioritizing and sticking to your agenda, etc. But if time management were only about what you do, then why do some people seem calm and centered and others seem flustered when faced with the same deadline?

Have you ever been waiting for an elevator and it seems to take an eternity, especially when you are in a hurry? Conversely, have you ever been on a vacation that was filled with amazing adventures and a month seems like a week? As Kermit the Frog once said, “Times flies when you’re having fun, and time’s also fun when you’re having flies.”

Looking at it from the big picture, clocks reduce time and make it finite. But what is time, but life itself? Time is actually your experience. By measuring time, it turns a succession of unique moments into a number and distances us from our subjective experience.

Lewis Mumford once said, “The clock, not the steam engine heralded the industrial age.” The more finely we measured time, first into hours, then minutes and seconds, the less we seem to have of it and the more the clock usurped sovereignty over our experience of life, until today when we are all — on the clock. Yet industry and business require a precise coordination of human activity. It’s hard to imagine how we could function in our organizations without the clock.

Can We Function in Society and Still Experience the Luxury of Being Unhurried?

This particular conundrum has been fascinating me lately. I grew up in the “hurry” family. I watched my parents race from one activity to the next, living under a sense of constant pressure. Naturally, I followed suit and lived my adult life this way, too. That is, of course, until reading the latest research on hormone imbalances–could it be motivated by the fear of hitting menopause without my hormones in balance? Aging — yet another reason to fear time

Some studies suggest that raised cortisol levels over extended periods of time cause hormone imbalances. Cortisol is a hormone your body produces when you are feeling hurried, inpatient, or overwhelmed, among other things. This requires the body to leech other hormones to regain balance, which eventually leads to long-term imbalances. Hormone imbalances in both men and women cause an enormous array of physical and mental problems that we are only beginning to be aware of.

To that end, over the last few years I decided to experiment with taking up to two months off every year so I could experience the luxury of an unhurried existence. The happiness, creative insights, health and well being I experienced were beyond belief. Yet, as soon as I came back to work I readopted the hurried state of mind. Finally, I asked myself and my clients, “Can we function in society and also experience the luxury of an unhurried existence?” I decided it was a worthy enough experiment, and have been surveying people and researching this topic ever since. Here is my summation of the top 2 ways to do that. For the 3rd best way view my previous blog post on Breathing:

1. Keep Things Handy for Idle Times

Make a list of regular activities that trigger you into feeling impatient. I used to get very impatient in traffic but then I realized I can use this time to be productive or get entertained. I decided to start listening to audio books. If I want a book now I go to a service like Audible to see if they have the book as an MP3. In fact, now I sometimes can hardly wait till I get to drive so I can listen to the next part of my book. Keep small things handy like your mp3 player, a book, or a notepad. Idle time can become brainstorming time. I often create a list of things I want to find a solution to. This could be a new business idea, a relationship problem I want to think through, thoughts about a new blog post or anything else that needs a good thought process. I brainstorm on all possible solutions, and choose my favourite idea and start action planning it.

2. Practice Letting Go Every Day

One of the most important skills you can ever learn is to let go of thoughts that don’t serve you. It will entirely change your life. As David Wagoner says in his wonderful poem, Lost: “What do you do when you’re lost in the forest? Stand still. The trees ahead, the bushes beside you are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here.” The point is that when you’re overwhelmed and lost, stand still. Back up to a place where you feel good, then you will begin to activate the neocortex. Usually when you feel hurried you are operating from the Reptilian Complex, where you are much less innovative, efficient, and able to focus.

Most of us treat time as a precious commodity in short supply. Time is precious, but it’s only scarce if you believe it is. Taking your time ironically lets you operate at a higher level of efficiency. So whenever you find yourself rushing try letting go of the belief in time scarcity and act as if you have all the time the world. Try it for 5 minutes and see what happens. The phenomenon may seem strange but here’s why it works so well. When you are rushing, chances are you are doing one thing while thinking about something else – like where you need to be, where you’d prefer to be. This kind of mental activity prevents us from being present with the job at hand. By actually becoming present, time seems to expand. It’s all in the experience.

If you find it hard to let go of unhelpful beliefs, check out the Sedona Method. It’s one of those easy things you can do anywhere, anytime, everyday. After a while a sense of time expansion can become your default way of being.

What very mysterious things days are. Sometimes they fly by, and other times they seem to last forever, yet they are all exactly twenty-four hours. There’s quite a lot we don’t know about them. Melanie Benjamin, Alice I Have Been

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If you’d like to help the people in your organization be better at the “inner game” of time management, give us a call at 1-866-294-2988 (1-604-222-2276). Or check out our web site for more tips and free articles.

Habits got you where you are and so the good news is that new habits can eventually get you where you want to go. Habits write new neuron pathways in your brain. Over time this creates a new default. This of course isn’t new information.  Aristotle, the ancient Greek philosopher, once said:”We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit.”  Here’s a couple of examples, Linda’s new habit of walking to the gym instead of driving helped her lose 5 extra pounds over one year. Mark’s new habit of getting all his supplies ready by the door the night before helped him stop being late.

Here are 5 tried and true habits for creating the change you want:

1.  Create an ideal outcome

David Whyte, an expert on workplace creativity, is quoted as saying “The antidote to exhaustion is not necessarily rest, but often it’s wholeheartedness.” Often you can’t change something because you are far too focused on what you don’t want. This only reinforces it and can make you exhausted. See if you can reframe in terms of what you do want. For example, “I don’t want to attend these long boring meetings,” becomes “I’d like to have shorter, more engaging and productive meetings.” “I am tired of this constant back pain” becomes “I’d like to have a healthy spine.” Sounds simple, but do you do actually practice this as much as you could? That habit alone of reframing could create a sense of wholeheartedness that will fuel your change like nothing else.

Bottom Line

Here are 4 short activities to help you try these habits:

1. Write out 3 complaints you have in your life and reframe them in terms of what you want instead.
2. The next time something happens that triggers an “unhelpful” negative response throw both arms in the air and yell out “Excellent!”
3. Spend an hour this weekend de-cluttering one area of your home. While doing it, think of a goal you’d like to manifest and see if this helps move you further towards your goal.
4. Think of a change you want to make and then simply ask yourself “If I were exceptional at ___________ (being the change I want to see) – what would I do?”

For more ideas, tips, programs and support go to The Artistry of Change web site